The 4 Keys to Achieving Financial Wellness
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By Guest
We all know that getting our personal finances on track is a challenge. I’m always comparing financial wellness to exercise and in this case, starting your financial journey is not unlike deciding to run your first marathon. You know it will be a challenge, you know you’ll probably want to give up at least once, and you know that it will be utterly life-changing and amazing if you follow through. The thing that you might not know is that, just like with training for a marathon, there are 4 keys to achieving financial wellness. As you start your journey to financial wellness, you will need the following:
1. A Very Clear Reason for Why You’re Doing This
Is it so you can have autonomy over your time? Is it because you want your kids to live a better life than the one you did? Maybe you want to prove to yourself and all your naysayers that you had it in you the whole time. As long as the reason is 100% authentic to you and gets your blood pumping, it’s valid and necessary.
2. A Very Clear Vision of The Future Life You’re Attempting to Create
It’s really hard to get somewhere if you have no idea where you’re going. If you haven’t yet this month, here is your invitation to sit down with a notebook and write down the most intensely detailed version of what your ideal life will look like in 5 years. Get ridiculously specific. What kinds of clothes will you wear? What car do you drive? How many snack breaks are you taking on a specific day? Are they organic snacks? Live your ideal life in your mind before you live it in reality. This will be your north star for the duration of this journey.
3. A Coach (or At Least A Strong Support System)
Okay, insert shameless plug here. However, doing anything that requires changing habits for an extended period of time while completely changing your life requires dedicated support. Could you make this type of full-life overhaul completely on your own? Sure. It is within the realm of human possibility. It’s just not as likely as if you put a support system in place from day one.
The cool thing about working with a coach is that you not only get mental and emotional support, but a good coach should also give you a framework to keep you on track. The support system that you put in place will keep you going when you’re not on the phone with your coach. And, that brings me to the last key element you need to achieve financial wellness.
4. The Courage to Have Some Hard Conversations
Out of all the information that I’ve provided, this one might be the toughest of the 4 keys to reach financial wellness. In case you couldn’t tell, this is the thing I’ve been building up to. The step that most people never consider or choose to overlook is the need to have some tricky conversations at the beginning of this life-changing journey with money. While we’re all independent grown-ups who can do what we want, the fact is the way we spend our money affects other people. Usually, the people who are most affected are the people we love the most and are therefore the people with whom it may feel hardest to have these convos. Sorry; I don’t make the rules. The good news is I’ve included a cheat sheet to make it easier for you to get started with this crucial step.
The Seven Conversations You Need to Have to Get Your Money on Track
Depending on the nature of your relationships and current financial situation, there are 7ish conversations that you will need to have when you’re getting your finances on track. When you join my course (hint, hint) you will get scripts to deal with all seven of these, but for today I’m just going to tease you with the whole list and get detailed about the one you need to have with your spouse.
Get ready to get honest with your:
- Spouse / Life Partner / Forever Roommate
- Parents
- Children
- Friends
- Debtors
- Bank
- Financial Coach / Advisor / Therapist
My personal life philosophy revolves around two things: radical love and open, honest, and clear communication. When it comes to the person with whom you’ve chosen to live your life, it is crucial to establish clear lines of communication especially when it comes to your money. Personal finances are just that – personal – so there is a very good chance that the way you approach money is very different from that of your spouse. Give yourself and your partner grace as you approach this delicate topic. You will both be bringing your own debts, good or bad habits, money mindset blocks, and financial goals to the table. It’s imperative that you take the time to sit down with your person to create a shared life vision and mutual strategy for how to handle your finances together.
I’ve put together the following script to help you get the conversation started. While this initial opening will get the two of you on a strong foundation, it’s imperative that you check in periodically (I like to have these big conversations once per quarter) to make sure you’re still on the same page.
Script: Starting a Life-Long Conversation
Hey [Love of my Life]
[Set up the conversation] I wanted to let you know that I’m working on improving [my/our] financial future.
[Establish partnership] I would love to do it with you and/or get your help setting up our new plan.
[Logistics] The next step in the plan is to track all my current finances and it would be best to pull in your information as well.
[Set expectations] It’s not necessarily going to be easy to improve our finances and we’ll have to change some habits.
[Explain why you’re doing this] But, it’s really important to me to do this. I want to do [the following things in our life] and I think this is the best way to make this happen.
[Ask for help] Will you help me? I can’t do this without you.
Set aside at least an hour for this conversation and make sure you’re holding it in a neutral space while speaking from a place of open honesty. For many people, talking about finances creates defensiveness, brings up feelings of shame, or can even feel hopeless. Frame this as a conversation about your future together and the strategies that you want to pursue to build your best life. Your partner is your teammate in this rough and tumbled world. When the two of you work together, nothing can hold you back.
Conclusion
I’ve now given you the 4 keys to achieving financial wellness, including a script to help you and your partner get the first conversation about money started. It is now your responsibility to take what you’ve learned and then apply it to your financial situation. If you don’t put in the work to achieve financial wellness, then your current circumstances won’t change. So take some time each day to start doing the work.
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